I blame the haggis

On Friday night, I went to a dinner function for work. We were marketing, so I was one of three people from Northrop and the other seven people were clients. It was a dinner put on by the Society of St. Andrew of Scotland to celebrate the battle of Bannockburn.

It was a gentleman's dinner which means the room was filled with men in dark suits with a good portion wearing kilts. It was one of those events which will seem ridiculous as I try to explain it to you, but (due to alcohol consumption or the spirit of levity) was actually fun. In fact, I am having trouble writing about it because it seems like such a throwback to what my generation thinks of the 1950's.

The event schedule went something like this:

-walk in the door and grab a beer
-talk and try to memorize names
-a bagpiper walks through the crowd into the ball room which is supposed to be an indication that we are to follow
-Sit down and finish another beer
-a troop of bagpipers and drummers walks in and performs
-introduction
-on the stage, a man in a kilt in front of a piano has us stand up and sing Scottish songs out of a book
-food
-more bagpipes
-the bottle of whisky is opened and everyone toasting to something said in an indecipherable brogue
-a haggis is brought out and a man 'addresses the haggis' which involves reciting a long poem while waving a Scottish dirk and stabbing the dish followed by a shot of whisky
-more bagpipes
-a speaker
-more singing
-more food and whisky and toasts
-bagpipes, singing, food, whisky
-another speaker talking about what a good guy Robert the Bruce was
-whisky, bagpipes, whisky, dessert, whisky, singing, whisky, whisky

What have I learned:

1. I need to choose my marketing engagements more carefully.
2. I really had a good time but maybe next year I will maintain my usual reserve.
3. Whisky aids in the enjoyment of bagpipes.
4. Haggis isn't so bad but I noticed that it was the turning point of the night. Once the haggis was brought out we started to pick up speed.

From what I can tell, the people running the dinner were Scots who have been living in Australia for 20 or more years. It makes me wonder if twenty years from now I will be a member of an American equivalent: The St. Lombardi Society. We can have dinners on Super Bowl Sunday, eat burgers and celebrate the day Brett Favre came to Green Bay.